Adventures of a(n Unemployed) Litigatrix

Ahhhh…and the countdown to my jump into the Hudson begins.

Hudson River from Bear Mountain Bridge, courtesy of Wikipedia

Saturday I dived into the frigid waters of the Atlantic Ocean at Coney Island to prepare for the open water swim portion of my upcoming triathlon.  As you should know by now, I’m participating in the Nautica New York City Triathlon as a member of the Leukemia Lymphoma Society’s Team in Training.  Click here to make a donation.

The swim was pretty decent, but I don’t know how I am going to deal with a million people being on top of me at the race start.  I had a brilliant idea to just hang back a little bit, but I am afraid that is going to be everyone else’s brilliant idea too and that more undesired congestion will ensue.  I guess we’ll have to just play this one by ear.

I then skipped the run portion of our workout to go home and get ready for my trip to the NEW Yankee Stadium!!!  I have mixed feelings about how necessary it was to spend all of that money on the new stadium. Undeniably, it was a minimum of bad timing on the City’s part, oh with the economic crisis and all.  But enough of my political ramblings, and onto my observations regarding Alex Rodriguez’s bum… I mean, the new Stadium.

We first took a quick browse through the Yankee’s Museum before heading over to the concessions stand.  My feelings on the museum are generally ambivalent.  While some of the older memorabilia was interesting, like the jerseys of Babe Ruth and Lou Gherig, for example, the newer memorabilia was frankly redundant.  As my friend Lauren appropriately pointed out — why do I need to see Mariano Rivera’s mitt in the Yankee’s Museum, when I can see it on the field.  Indeed.

Ugh, $6 hot dog

Now onto the concessions.  According to a Yankee’s press release, they were keeping their $3 hot dogs and soft drinks as a commitment to “affordability”.  Well after going to the Hebrew National stand, the Johnny Rocket’s stand, and standing in line at the Nathan’s Hot Dogs stand for about 15 minutes, said $3 hot dogs were nowhere to be found.  It took about that long for me to realize that they were actually the “kid’s hot dogs”, which by the way were not available at that time.  Outrageous!!  Now if anyone knows if there are actual adult sized $3 hot dogs to be found at Yankees Stadium, please correct me.  Similarly outrageous was the $10 I paid for a Miller Lite draft (albeit in a souvenir cup), and the $9 I paid for a BOTTLE of Miller Lite in the stands (remedied only by the fact that I didn’t have to get out of my seat to get it.  I did, however, have to practically give the guy next to me a lap dance trying to get my IDs over to the vendor.  Score for him.)

All in all, it was worth it to see A-Rod’s bum … I mean…. the Yankees beat Detroit (although it did take until about the Sixth inning for anyone to score).

Me & Abby @ Yankee Stadium

Joshua Dean in Action

Saturday night, my friend Abby, myself, and a bunch of my coupley friends went to the Galapagos Art Space for the Floating Kabarette (Main Street at Water Street, Brooklyn, NY).  The Floating Kabarette is hosted by a pair of interesting characters who call themselves Olga and Bjorn, who sport a wardrobe consisting mostly of leotards and bathing suits from American Apparel.  Olga was so thin I think I saw her internal organs.  Over the course of approximately three hours, they introduced various acts including Burlesque dancers (one of whom had a wardrobe malfunction and exposed her nipple Janet Jackson style), aerial acrobatics, a magician, and a trapeze artist.

Olga and Bjorn left nothing to the imagination in their sexually charged dialogue, disposing of innuendo and going for the obvious.  At one point, Olga, who sports a faux Eastern European accent slipped into a Midwestern accent.  

Although it was generally entertaining, the best parts of the show were for one the space (Galapagos Art Space’s bottom level is a pool over which banquettes are suspended, making several “islands”), and second the aerial acrobatics performer, Joshua Dean who incredibly talented.  After taking an aerial acrobatics class, I truly appreciate how difficult it is to accomplish those feats (and painful the next day).   Joshua Dean is performing again on August 14th in his show Suspended Cirque: Urbanopolis at the Galapagos Art Space, and while I probably would not return for the Floating Kabarette, I would go back to see him.

A free drink, either the signature apricot lemonade or a draft beer, was included with the admission price ($10).  The apricot lemonade, served in a martini glass, was too cloying, and although it purported to have alcohol in it, I didn’t feel a thing.  It was a waste of calories.  

Sunday was a lazy day.  Abby and I had planned on seeing Harry Potter in IMAX 3D, but we failed to plan ahead and by the time we went to buy tickets the morning of the performance, they were already sold out.

 Yesterday (Monday) I had my first aerial acrobatics class at the New York Circus Arts Academy.  Its ridiculously fun, but ridiculously hard.  We climbed up the silks, and did some inversions.  My entire body (especially my crotchal muscles and my hands), is in pain.  The most significant pain is in my inner thigh muscles and my hands.  I am just hoping I get better at this soon, because otherwise I’m going to essentially be torturing myself every week. 

What’s on the Agenda for this Week?

Tomorrow (Wednesday, July 22nd) I am going to the Restless Legs Reading at Lolita Bar (266 Broome Street @ Allen Street, 212.966.7223).  Restless Legs brings travelers, travel writers, and the like together for book readings which focus on sharing tales from the road.

Tomorrow’s reading is called:  the Holy Foreskin vs. Amazon.  One of the readings will be from David Gann, a staff writer at The New Yorker, who’s new book, The Lost City of Z, is an account of exploring the Amazon.  From the New York Times:  ”The Lost City of Z is at once a biography, a detective story, and a wonderfully vivid piece of travel writing that combines Bruce Chatwinesque powers of observation with a Waugh-like sense of the absurd.”   The second reading will be from David Farley (the creator of Restless Legs), who’s book An Irreverent Curiosity:  In Search of the Church’s Strangest Relic in Italy’s Oddest Town which is about his search to find the foreskin of Jesus.

And for the rest of the week?   A whole lot of nothing quite frankly.  Since Sunday is the New York City Triathlon, I’m going to be resting a lot and attending various pre-race meetings as it gets closer to Sunday.  I might try to catch up on some movies that I have been meaning to see (i.e., Year One, The Hangover, &c.).

If anyone wants to come and watch me to swim you can go to these locations.  My swim wave goes off at either 6:20 and 6:23 AM (Yes, that’s AM):

Swim Start – Riverside Park & 98th Street on the Hudson River.
Swim Exit - Riverside Park & 79th Street on the Hudson River.
Run Course - along 72nd Street from Henry Hudson Parkway to Central Park West
Race Finish – Dead Road in Central Park near the band shell off the 72nd Street Transverse

I’m just hoping that my experience wont be like this guy’s.